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墨書 Inktalez
“Principal, you must consider my exemplary character and my unwavering dedication to my studies. I have never committed any wrongdoing or harassed virtuous women. I have not engaged in petty theft or sold illicit materials. I attend class diligently and always return any money I find. How can you so cruelly extinguish the potential of a student like me, a pillar of the nation? Woe is me! I have an elderly mother to support and a half-year-old nephew who relies on me for sustenance. My entire family depends on me to graduate and find work. Oh, Principal, you cannot do this to me! Woe is me…”
After his dramatic monologue, he broke into a wailing cry that resembled a pig being slaughtered. He even took the Principal’s designer trousers to wipe his nose, leaving the Principal feeling an overwhelming urge to kick him out. However, he feared that if this troublemaker spread rumors about him assaulting a student, it would ruin his reputation. Thus, he could only endure the humiliation of having his expensive trousers desecrated.
“Now, listen here, Extraordinary Student. I am well aware of your conduct; it’s quite memorable every year when you visit my office. And as for your attendance… according to various subject teachers, you spend most of your time in class sleeping. Your exam results are consistently below passing marks. It’s not that I wish to make things difficult for you, but no teacher sees you as anything but a menace. Almost all the female students have been subjected to your antics, and even some of the handsome male students in Company Commander’s class have not escaped your attention. This puts me in quite the predicament. Despite all this, I still believe there might be hope for you yet; I intend to give you another chance to improve your studies,” the Principal said with a feigned tone of concern.
Upon hearing this, Lu Fei Fan immediately pretended to be emotionally distraught. Internally, he cursed under his breath at the Principal’s words about “sculpting rotten wood.” What an old fox! It was clear he was determined not to let him graduate and enjoy life while causing chaos in society. Naturally, he wasn’t buying it and cried even more pitifully than before, as if mourning a lost mother.
“Principal, how can you listen to those treacherous teachers’ slanders? I’ve always thought of you as a noble figure who can discern loyalty from treachery—a beacon of light for us students! How could someone like me, who has failed multiple times in School History, bring shame upon Pandora's Box? Do you want to tarnish the reputation of our Free Federation Academy? Principal, please just turn a blind eye this once! I promise not to leak any embarrassing photos of you with rashes on your backside!”
“You… how do you know about my…” The Principal jumped up, pointing at him in alarm.
With an innocent smile plastered across his face, Lu Fei Fan replied cheerfully, “Principal, I stumbled upon that little detail while accidentally peeking into the bathhouse.”
“You… what…” The Principal was momentarily at a loss for how to deal with this audacious student who had caught him off guard. Could it be that he had been followed while visiting his old flame at the hot springs?
Regaining his composure, he quickly clarified, “Ahem! The School Committee and Teaching Office have already made their decision; I have no authority to change it. Please don’t put me in such a difficult position; I’m just as helpless as you are…” The Principal wiped his sweat nervously; indeed, beyond him lay the larger School Committee board.
However, this rogue was clearly not buying into that excuse and continued to press on: “Principal, please spare me! If I fail to graduate and lose my mind over it, who knows what might happen? I could expose those adult films hidden within your virtual helmet! At that point, it would be your esteemed image that would be ruined! Principal, give me a chance—I want to be a good person! Don’t push me down a dark path…”
…What an impressive threat! The Principal was momentarily stunned as he glanced at the fixed helmet on his desk—a well-crafted sea-blue device resembling a steel helmet. This was the kind of device people used to enter the Virtual Network through a super brain-level connection known as the Superbrain Device. Of course, aside from these fixed virtual devices, there were also more portable versions available at exorbitant prices.
“How do you know what’s in my helmet…” The Principal finally managed to ask after processing everything.
“Ah, I often sneak in here to copy some seeds from you, updating my resource reserves. I even stumbled upon the fact that the esteemed Principal has a penchant for the noble art of selfies! The content here is profound and enlightening, truly opening my eyes and filling me with admiration. Please accept my humble knee, Principal!” His tone was filled with exaggerated sincerity.
The Principal found himself at a loss for words, unable to retort, feeling both amused and exasperated. After all, this rascal was already kneeling; where was the admiration in that? It felt more like a threat. If it weren't for the agreement handed down from above, he would have expelled this troublemaker from the Federation Academy three years ago.
“Uh, um…” The Principal pondered how to respond, feeling somewhat at his wit's end.
“Ah, Principal! I was wrong! Please spare me! What I said earlier was just a slip of the tongue…”
Seeing his threat fail, the scoundrel launched into a dramatic display of sobbing and heartfelt repentance worthy of a Best Actor award. However, the Principal remained unmoved by his theatrics. The only thing that pained him was the state of his Designer Trousers, which were now utterly ruined, covered in the rascal's snot and tears—completely turned into a rag.
After two whole hours of this ordeal, Lu Fei Fan finally exited the Principal's Office. Once the advanced electric gate closed behind him, he let loose a string of curses.
“Damn it! Which soft-hearted principal is this? I ended up using an entire bottle of chili oil! My eyes are dried out from crying—this hurts like hell!” He wiped his eyes where the chili oil had stung, causing another wave of tears and snot to flow.
In a huff, he pulled out a book from his bag, glanced at it, then threw it on the ground and stomped on it several times while cursing under his breath before tossing his hair back and striding away.
Moments later, the plump bald Principal emerged from his office. He suddenly noticed a book on the floor and bent down to pick it up. After brushing it off and taking a closer look, he couldn't help but chuckle at the title:
—“How to Become a Best Actor: A Quick Training Manual.”
Finally understanding what had transpired in his office today, he realized that last year's antics had escalated into this year's shameless performance of self-pity. For the sake of graduation, this rascal truly spared no effort; he couldn't help but admire the cunning schemes of this rogue.
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