I couldn't sleep at all.
Once again, I raised the Suona to my lips, the sound as high-pitched, resonant, and melodious as ever. The birds, summoned by the call of the phoenix, began to gather around me...
"That sounds terrible! You're disturbing the peace!" a voice roared, old yet powerful.
"Who?"
I turned around in fright, chills running down my spine. The door was securely shut, the windows tightly closed, and the entire neighborhood was silent.
Stepping onto the balcony and looking out, I could only see the streetlights illuminating the darkness. At this hour, no one would come visiting in the dead of night.
I must have been driven to hallucinations by that grumpy old man on duty.
Holding my breath and focusing, just as I was about to put the whistle back in my mouth, my phone screen suddenly lit up with a message that read: "Please stop playing! I'm about to go crazy!"
My grandfather used to play for people in the countryside. I had followed him to performances since I was little and had witnessed real funerals; tales of " Walking in the Underworld " and "possession" were nothing new to me.
"What do you know? I officially started learning at four, gained some fame at nine, won city-wide awards, and I'm an Intangible Cultural Heritage Inheritor..." I shouted into the air, "You don't know anything!"
There was a long silence with no response.
The whistle returned to my lips.
As soon as the music began again, my phone exploded with messages:
"What are you playing?"
"Get lost!"
"You think we don't matter?"
I was genuinely confused.
Then a call came in from the Duty Elder: "Just wash up and go to bed!"
So it turned out that not only was I playing poorly, but now I couldn't even play at all!
My Achilles' heel has been grasped tightly.
I wandered around the neighborhood like an ant on a hot pan, doing nothing. The Duty Elder approached me and asked, "Regretting it yet?"
I ignored that old man. He must know something. He was reveling in my misfortune, watching me make a fool of myself. But I had no one to confide in.
My roommate, Jiang Xiaoli, came to see me. I met her at the entrance of the community, and as we walked along the overgrown path, she carefully lifted her legs as if something might leap out from the grass and bite her.
She placed the fruits and milk she brought on the table, let out a long sigh, and patted her chest, saying, "The place you live in is too eerie!"
I didn't dare reveal the truth; I was afraid it would scare her.
"With you and Xiao Bing here, all the other students have given up on that graduate spot!" Jiang Xiaoli said. "How are you preparing? Your credits are neck and neck with Xiao Bing's; everyone says it mainly depends on the competition between you two now!"
According to the rules of our circle, I am my grandfather's first Suona disciple, with Xiao Bing as the second. I never expected that in the end, it would be us—students from the same school—who would clash fiercely.
I am not alone; I am not fighting for myself.
So I won't give up.
Getting his son into Yanjing Music Academy is Director Xiao's ultimate goal, and he certainly won't allow any setbacks.
But right now, I truly lack confidence.
Perhaps there are guests around.
I blew into my Suona again, attempting to play "Hundred Birds Paying Homage to the Phoenix," but no encouraging messages appeared on my phone.
Instead, I heard windows slamming shut all around me.
I played with great effort and sincerity, but even Jiang Xiaoli—the academic underachiever—could tell that I was struggling.
"Why do I feel like you haven't made any progress?"
The truth often cuts deep.
Seeing that I was in low spirits, Jiang Xiaoli stayed behind to keep me company.
For three consecutive days, the two of us indulged in food and exploration. She was curious why there were "not a single ghostly shadow" in our neighborhood.
I replied, "They have no shadows."
This day was particularly special. After settling Jiang Xiaoli down to sleep, I got dressed, got out of bed, and opened the door to go outside.
In the duty room, a delivery person handed me a large bundle of incense and paper offerings. The Duty Elder looked at me with an unprecedented warmth in his eyes. "Most residents here have been lonely since they moved in. Even during Qingming Festival, very few family members come to pay their respects. It's rare for someone to remember."
In the center square, I drew a circle facing my hometown and wrote my grandfather's name inside it. Using the Duty Elder's lighter, I set the paper money ablaze.
As the ashes flew into the air, the flames flickered so intensely that I could barely open my eyes. In that hazy moment, it seemed as if countless translucent figures were drifting around me, attempting to collect the burnt ashes, but none succeeded.
I had left my hometown; they were forgotten by their loved ones.
I lit another pile of paper money this time without drawing a circle or writing anything. Soon, countless shadows emerged to absorb the incense and take away the paper offerings. When the fire extinguished, the shadows vanished.
The Duty Elder helped me up from my knees that had gone numb.
Returning to my room, I found Jiang Xiaoli sitting in the living room with a pale face. "I'm leaving tomorrow!" she declared.
The curtain on the balcony was drawn open, allowing a view of where I had burned the paper money.
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