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墨書 Inktalez
I see my own changes, and I have completely opened up a whole new life.
There's nothing wrong with that. I have completely convinced myself that I can accept all of this. I want to say goodbye to the past. I have written a letter to Betty. If she reads my letter, understands my situation, and is willing to come and live with me, then that would naturally be even better. I would gladly accept it.
However, I waited for so long, but I didn't receive a letter from her, and I won't even wait for her in person. She chose to leave me for Selena and those younger siblings. Otherwise, what other explanation could there be? I can only think of these. Since it's like this, I'll just let it go.
Dear Jonas, bless me from above. It's not that I don't want Betty, it's that she doesn't want to come over. I've settled down in Paris now, and even though I still live in a poor area, it's several times better than where we used to live! You wouldn't believe that I'm now a celebrity in The Jan family. I'm lucky to have been given a second chance by them, and I think I'll only get better from here.
Due to not feeling the warmth of a woman for so long, I was afraid of letting Betty down. Now it seems that I was worrying too much. I have found a woman I admire, but I'm not sure if she is interested in me. I feel my blood warming up, flowing through my body like fire. I have finally welcomed a whole new me, and I am so happy. So, I want to share my joy with you.
This weekend is very rare because both Huang and I are off. I haven't seen him for several days, so I knocked on his door early in the morning, wanting to talk to him.
"These days I haven't seen your figure! What are you busy with? Is there something you can't even tell me about!"
"I'm dealing with some matters in the army, also arranged by Captain Jan."
"I just don't understand. With such a beneficial network of relationships, you should be feeling happy. Why do you seem so down every day? Is there something on your mind? It's like you're a completely different person from when I first met you."
"Do I? I feel the same. Before, we were both fighting for survival, having to bravely ensure our own survival. Now that we've survived, life has returned to normal. I want to work hard to return to where I belong, instead of being a lackey, constantly trying to please others. It's truly despicable!"
"What's wrong with that? I give you every penny you deserve, and I get to mingle with these aristocrats every day, learning all sorts of new and exciting things from them. It's a very glamorous lifestyle, isn't it what you want?"
"I am a soldier. Do you know what a soldier's duty is? It's to be ready for the battlefield at all times, to fight on the front lines, to protect our homeland. You might find it funny, but that's my ideal. I'll tell you the truth - I climbed into a relationship with Zhan in order to smoothly return to my previous unit. I was brought down by previous political struggles and labeled dishonorable. It's hard to clear my name, but he has a way!"
"When the project is completed, it may be the time for me to return smoothly! I hope he keeps his promise!"
"Admire you! Do you like the battlefield so much? Haven't you experienced enough of the sorrow of war? Wake up, leave the good days behind, why think about returning to the army, it's asking for trouble! You're good at everything, but when you have something on your mind, it shows clearly on your face. You don't know how to be indirect, that's the one thing Mr. Zhan doesn't like about you, even though he trusts you a lot."
"Xiao Bei, I've noticed that you've changed a lot. You're not the same Zhang Xiaobei that I met in the refugee camp. Your transformation has really impressed me. I have principles and boundaries when it comes to doing things..."
"Wait, are you implying that I don't have principles and boundaries when it comes to doing things?"
"Hey, that's not what I meant! I..."
"You clearly meant that!"
Two people suddenly stood still for two minutes, and the situation finally eased down!
"I am very grateful that you pulled me back from the brink of death. I will remember this favor for the rest of my life. I also thank you for bringing me to Mr. Zhan, which gave me a different life. Everything feels like a dream!"
"You don't need to thank me, you did well on your own, I just lent a hand! But Xiao Bei, there are some things I still need to say. It's a chaotic time now, they are all fighting for power and profit, this game can make or break a person in an instant, so you need to have a balance in your heart, some words can be trusted, some should not be believed, to avoid falling into a desperate situation. Also, don't trust women too much, it's best to keep a certain distance from them. You are not yet experienced enough to manipulate women like they do, sometimes a misstep can lead to eternal regret!"
"Thank you for your reminder, I will be cautious, but it's your future and destiny that is the most worrying!"
"I don't need much, as long as I can return to the army, I've never thought about anything else. Remember not to place too much importance on money and possessions. People should live for life, live for happiness!"
"I am very happy now. Let's talk about something else! Do you remember what I told you about my situation with Elder Yu? I think I am now capable of fulfilling his last wish before he passed away. I need your help with this!"
"You said!"
"I need to arrange for a car and two workers to go to the village of XX in XX state. The cemetery has been chosen, and I need them to help me dig the grave and move the soil. Once the task is completed, we will return immediately. I don't think it will take too much time! The tombstone has also been engraved and is at a craftsman's shop on the street ahead."
"Elder Yu's spirit in heaven will definitely bless you. With such a good friend, no, it should be family, hurry up! If you delay any longer, you may not make it back before dark! Have a safe journey!"
Goodbye, Huang, I'm setting off with Elder Yu. If it weren't for him, I wouldn't have been able to come all the way to Paris, France, and a series of things wouldn't have happened afterwards. Anyway, so far, I've been pretty lucky.
Huang's words make me very uncomfortable, but I do approve of him as a friend. Perhaps there is some truth in what he says, but I definitely do not agree with his so-called duty as a soldier. It's possible that he will be forced into exile again, and the struggle between life and death is never-ending. I prefer to follow my inner feelings, enjoy the present, and lay the groundwork for my prosperous life. I even have a clear plan for wealth in my mind.
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