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墨書 Inktalez
"In the Lingnan Mountains, there is a pool, its waters chillingly cold, a deep green and eerily serene. It is said to connect to the Nine Underworlds. Those who fall into the pool are immediately surrounded by countless ghosts, returning to life with altered personalities, hence it is called the Rebirth Pool, or the Pool of Possession." -- Liu Xun of the Tang Dynasty, "Records of Strange Tales from Lingnan"
August 8th, the fourteenth day of the seventh lunar month, a day of darkness.
Seven days ago, you asked me if there are ghosts in this world. I did not believe.
My name is Ding Zihyun. I am a level two psychological counselor with a graduate degree. My undergraduate major was clinical medicine at a prestigious Medical University. I share this not to boast but to convey a clear and firm concept I have developed over many years of education: there are no ghosts in this world.
Of course, I watch horror films and enjoy various bizarre stories; they are thrilling, after all—young people understand that. However, life is life, and in my work, I remain objective and rigorous. I have encountered all sorts of strange psychological cases, but I can always find a scientific explanation. Yet there are exceptions; out of one hundred cases, often ninety-eight stem from fantasies, delusions, hallucinations, or paranoia—some even reach the level of mental illness—but there are always one or two that defy explanation.
I am currently the head of the psychology department. The reason I hold this position is that my predecessor, Director Jiang—who was also my mentor after I joined this department—resigned due to his seniority, creating a gap that pushed me into this role.
Before he left, my mentor simply instructed me: "Remember the rules."
The rules were established by my mentor for our profession. Times change, and many people no longer know what these rules are; however, they have been passed down through generations. According to my mentor's mentor's mentor, he taught one of China's first generation of important founders in psychology, Pan Shu.
The rules are simple and consist of three points: 1. Do not refuse any clients, regardless of their status; 2. A psychological counselor is not a detective; do not attempt to uncover every truth behind the issues; 3. Remember, there are no demons—only delusions and hallucinations.
I agree with and understand the first two rules. Indeed, many people develop psychological issues that lead them to seek counseling and treatment; it is our duty to assist them or help them help themselves. There is no need to distinguish between rich and poor; at worst, we might use less medication and engage in more conversation.
But the third rule—isn't it somewhat perplexing?
Seven days ago.
A patient came in for consultation—a girl named Liang Yujie, seventeen years old. She was quite delicate-looking and wore a pink tracksuit. She arrived accompanied by her parents. They were polite and courteous; although anxious, they managed to suppress their inner turmoil—likely educated individuals.
After I had them sit down, I told them not to rush and began to explain the situation so I could understand the medical history. Her father spoke first, clearly a bit embarrassed. His daughter was in her second year of high school, always introverted, not fond of talking or interacting with others. Although her grades were poor, she was well-behaved, rarely went out, and had few friends. In her free time, she loved reading and listening to music, occasionally watching movies online. However, recently, his daughter had changed dramatically; she claimed to see ghosts at home and insisted on going to crowded places, refusing to return home. At night, she often curled up alone in the bathroom or hid in their room, terrified of the dark and of being alone. She would wake up screaming during the night.
“How long has this been going on?” I asked.
“For about four or five weeks. We were scared and asked around; they said it might be a psychological issue, so we hurried to bring her here,” the girl's mother replied.
I chatted with the girl for a few moments and observed her. Fortunately, although she looked pale and lacked energy, she could communicate and was quite aware of her surroundings. This is often the case with psychological disorders; being able to communicate is the first step. As long as the patient is willing to engage in conversation, there is hope.
I reassured the family a bit and prepared to take her to the Assessment Room for a Psychological Assessment Scale evaluation. However, the girl was clearly very shy and timid; it took her parents' repeated encouragement for her to follow me inside. The scale was quite simple, but I noticed she was taking a long time with each question. Was there an issue with her comprehension?
After nearly half an hour, she finally completed all four sets of scales. She sat quietly with her head down, nervously wringing her hands. I comforted her a bit before sitting at the computer to review the results in detail.
The Mental Health Assessment score indicated significant issues, particularly high scores in fear factors, paranoia factors, and interpersonal relationship factors; other areas were acceptable.
The Personality Assessment showed that the patient had an introverted personality and tended to isolate herself. Her emotions were unstable; she reacted strongly to stimuli and often experienced prolonged emotional distress. There were no significant signs of neuroticism; her level of concealment was low, indicating that the measurement results were reliable.
I set down the report. It seemed there were no abnormalities in terms of mental health; however, the situations described by her parents aligned with common symptoms seen in patients experiencing hallucinations or illusions.
I asked gently, “Liang Yujie, now that there’s no one else here, can you tell me about your situation? Don’t hold back; I’m here to help you.”
She hesitantly lifted her head. “Doctor, can you really help me? I... I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”
“Yes, trust me; we will address your issues together.”
Liang Yujie's expression suddenly turned pained as he clutched his head with both hands, curling up in the chair. "Lately, I've always been able to see a shadow following me. As soon as night falls, it comes out, and I see it often. I'm so scared."
"Oh, can you hear anything?"
"No, I just see it. Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night and see it in the corner of my room; other times, when I get up to use the bathroom and open the door, I suddenly see it! But when I turn on the light, it's gone!"
There were no auditory hallucinations; I noted this down.
"You... can see a shadow? Can you tell what it looks like?"
Liang Yujie released his hands and looked at me blankly. "I can't see clearly; it looks like a person's silhouette."
"Can you remember how this situation started?"
"I don't know. It seems like after I fell into the water, things have been like this."
No hallucinations; I recorded that as well.
"Fell into the water? Alright, let's talk about your experience of falling into the water. What can you remember?" From a psychological perspective, there is a therapy called shock therapy or exposure therapy, which attempts to help patients recall deeply traumatic scenes so they can gradually face them. Once they adapt completely, they can slowly return to a normal state. I was planning to approach this method.
Unexpectedly, Liang Yujie closed his eyes and shook his head vigorously. "I can't remember anything anymore. I just remember washing apples by a pond and somehow falling in. After that, I can't recall anything."
"Alright, if you can't remember, don't force it. Just relax, stay calm." Seeing that the patient was getting a bit agitated, I quickly stopped guiding him and shifted to emotional reassurance.
After thinking for a moment, I decided to have another chat with the family to see if I could uncover any details, such as early romance or online relationships. I asked Liang Yujie to stay inside while I stepped out to inquire about her parents' situation.
Her parents mentioned that their child had always been well-behaved, rarely went out, and seldom used the internet. Their lives were quite structured; although her grades were poor, she was diligent and eager to learn.
Hmm? Where could the problem lie? Typically, when there is a psychological issue, there is a process of development that leads to it, often with some trigger. I found myself deep in thought.
"By the way, doctor, there's something I don't know if it's related to this."
"Yes?" I replied casually.
"Our child never likes to go out. Now that she's in her senior year of high school, we couldn't bear to see her so anxious. A while ago, we enrolled her in a Summer Camp to encourage her to get out more. But then something happened—she fell into a pond in the mountains, and a male classmate rescued her. That night she had a fever, and after it subsided, she became like this. Doctor, could it be due to the shock?"
"I'm not sure; perhaps that could be one of the reasons," I said thoughtfully.
"Doctor, what should we do?"
"The Scale test shows high scores in fear, psychosis, and paranoia, but the overall score isn't too high. Talking with her reveals no particular issues. Considering what you just mentioned, I suspect this might be an acute stress reaction triggered by the incident—she may experience short-term emotional fluctuations or even delusions. Of course, there's also the possibility of acute simple schizophrenia during adolescence that needs further diagnosis. So, I'll give you some orders for tests like an Electroencephalogram and others. At the same time, let's try some diagnostic treatment by prescribing some nerve-nourishing medications and sedatives for observation. If there's no improvement, bring her back for another evaluation."
"Alright, thank you, doctor."
"Then that's settled; one of you can go pay the fee and bring back the receipt." I handed the orders to her father.
Just as he left, her mother pulled me aside with a mysterious air and hesitantly asked, "Doctor, do you think she might be possessed?"
"Auntie, where in this world are there Demons? We rely on science; if we're sick, we get treated. Don't think too much."
"Hey, hey!" she chuckled in response.
At that moment, my father took back the payment slip and watched the couple leave with their daughter, full of gratitude. I felt a bit emotional; every child is a treasure to their parents these days. They worry so much over any little issue. In contrast, kids born in the '90s often seem like flowers in a greenhouse, easily affected by many aspects of life, leading to various psychological problems.
Hmph, how could there be ghosts in this world? I scoffed at the thought.
Five years ago.
"Dr. Ding, we meet again." This was the first thing Liang Yujie said when she appeared before me. I looked up and realized it was her. I wondered why her parents weren't with her. She seemed a bit dazed, her eyes filled with confusion. "Come on, sit down and let's talk."
The girl settled onto the sofa. "How have you been these past two weeks? Feeling any better?" I noticed her outfit didn't quite match; she was still in casual clothes but had put on a pair of high heels. Judging by her height, Liang Yujie should be around one seventy; the heels made her look even taller. Oh? It seemed she had also applied eyeliner.
"Doctor, I feel very disoriented lately."
"Uh-huh, in what way do you feel disoriented? Is it after taking your medication? Sedatives can indeed have some side effects."
"No, it's not that. Sometimes I feel awake, and other times it's like I'm asleep without awareness. Some things seem like I've done them, while others feel as if they weren't me at all."
"Oh, have you seen anything unusual?"
"No, after taking the medication, things have quieted down a lot. I'm not as scared as before; it just feels like I'm two different people sometimes. At times I feel like I'm dreaming, only to wake up and find myself doing something completely nonsensical."
"Is that so? Actually, listen to me. My explanation is that you feel insecure deep down, have no friends, and lead a mundane life. Yet, you don't want to continue like this. So, your subconscious gradually creates a scenario where you feel haunted, as if someone wants to possess you, and then you'll be reborn, right? This is all just an illusion you've created." I said patiently.
I was about to continue when I suddenly noticed Liang Yujie's head drooping lower and lower. Hmm? Could she be falling asleep?!
I tried to reach out and tap her shoulder. "Hey, are you still listening?"
"Ah! Doctor, it's not like that, it's not like that! Please help me!" Liang Yujie suddenly lifted her head, gripping my arm with a look of panic in her eyes. I could see fear, confusion, and despair reflected in her gaze.
My heart softened instantly. "Alright, I'll help you. How do you want me to assist you?"
Liang Yujie's eyes widened in terror as she stared blankly to the side. Slowly, she said, "Doctor, there really are ghosts! I've been dreaming about falling into a cold, dark pool. I feel many shadows circling around me, and suddenly one of them entered my body! Later, a boy saved me and followed me home. She wants to possess me and take over my body to continue living. I can't resist her; I feel like I'm running out of time. Sometimes I can't even feel myself anymore. I don't want to disappear!"
I was a bit puzzled; didn't she just say she couldn't see anything? Why was she repeating herself now? Could it be that she truly had developed a split personality?
She suddenly turned to me and said, "I'm not crazy! I saw it! My parents think I have mental issues, but I can even talk to her! It's real—why don't you believe me?" She began to cry in despair.
At that moment, Liang Yujie looked nothing like a hysterical patient or a mental health case. It felt strange to me; perhaps what the girl said was true? I started to think from her perspective or maybe she was just severely delusional and had staged this whole drama herself. Would it help if I went along with her?
"Okay then, even if I believe you, how can I help?"
"You promise to help me?" Liang Yujie grasped onto my words like a drowning person clinging to their last straw.
"Um, sure."
"Doctor, I beg you, could you please go to that pond, the place where I fell into the water? As long as I can find someone to pay respects to her, she will let me go. But my parents would never allow me to travel far. Can you please go? I'm begging you, help me, and I will repay you."
To be honest, her pitiful appearance and the words "I will repay you" made it hard for me to refuse. As a single man, you understand.
"Alright, I agree. Come back for a follow-up in three days," I said impulsively.
Liang Yujie was overjoyed and turned to leave.
"By the way, Liang, that eyeliner really doesn't suit you. You'd look better without makeup." I couldn't help but say as she was about to walk out the door.
Liang Yujie didn't turn around but paused to say, "People need to change."
Should I go or not? After Liang Yujie left, I found myself pondering this question. Unknowingly, I had forgotten that I was breaking the rules.
After thinking about it all night, on the second day, I decided to take a leave of absence. I changed into a set of sportswear, put on my sneakers, and planned to check it out—consider it a little vacation. I even bought a stack of Joss Paper and stuffed it into my backpack.
Liang Yujie had told me where it was—a mountainous area that was quite remote. It took me quite some time by bus to get there. This place was famous for its rafting. Following Liang Yujie's directions, I walked for a long time and finally found the pond around one in the afternoon.
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