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墨書 Inktalez
"Did you bring it?"
In the Cha Chaan Teng, Uncle Xu invited me out for the first time. He sat on the gray sofa across from me, his expression colder than ever before.
"Oh, I brought it," I quickly pulled out a thick book from my backpack, comparable in thickness to War and Peace, titled National University Summary, and placed it on the table. I clasped my hands between my knees, sensing the conversation that was about to unfold.
"Have you made your choice?" Mr. Xu did not touch the book but looked at me calmly.
"I don't have money to attend..."
"Since you're here, stop pretending," Mr. Xu sipped his tea. "Xiao Mo is very naive and easily manipulated. I know what you're thinking. No matter what your intentions were regarding that incident, I will take responsibility for what I've done. Choose a school; I'll cover all expenses for four years. After four years, you'll be able to support yourself, and we’ll be even."
"Uncle Xu..."
"Your dad is about to be released. While he doesn't know about you, you should get as far away as you can. Don't blame me for being blunt; he's a scoundrel, and being his daughter is your misfortune."
I pressed my lips together and lowered my head.
"Think it over carefully and choose a suitable major..."
"Mr. Xu," I couldn't stand the tone he was using with me, as if our relationship was merely one of charity and dependence. I admitted that I had used him and also used Xu Wenmo, but that could not erase the happiness I felt that night in a daze. I liked him; I loved him. This was the innocent affection of a girl who had yet to experience the world—it was pure and untainted. "Don't you have any other feelings for me...?"
Mr. Xu looked at me deeply, his expression finally softening. "Ah, you're still a child; I can't bear to hurt you."
"So that means..." I eagerly wanted to clarify something.
But Mr. Xu decisively interrupted me, "Let’s put it this way: Xiao Mo's mother and I have reached an impasse, but we can't separate for certain reasons. Right now, we are living apart; she has her life, and I have mine. I shouldn't be telling you this, but since Xiao Mo was born, I've had lovers—more than one—and Xiao Mo has suffered irreparable harm because of it. To this day, I still have a steady partner; my living situation isn't suitable for a young girl like you. Focus on your studies, make friends at university, live a normal life—that's the path you should take."
I wanted to argue; I wanted to tell him that I would choose my own path, but I didn't dare to speak up. I was a weak survivor living under someone else's roof, so I nodded slightly. "I understand, Mr. Xu."
After our conversation ended, Mr. Xu left by car while I took a taxi back to the villa with my backpack on my shoulders. My father was about to be released; Mr. Xu was right about that. The thought filled me with dread—I didn't want to go back to that old life again. Even if I escaped my current environment, I wanted to live simply like an ordinary person without being burdened by my parents—just three meals a day.
"Have you chosen a school?" Xu Wenmo appeared silently in front of me with a smile on his face and handed me a glass of milk.
I took the milk and walked toward the sofa. "Thank you for helping with school."
"It's nothing; which city are you planning to go to?" Xu Wenmo followed behind me.
"What? Are you going to the same city as me?"
"Yeah."
"Then should we go to the same university?" I sank into the sofa and joked.
"Sit down two fists away from me," she said.
"Huh? You're not joking, right? I'm going to a third-tier school."
"Well, I'm not joking." She still missed the point.
"I said I can only go to a third-tier school. Are you really going to follow me there?"
"Sure," she replied as if it were obvious.
"Xu Wenmo, are you out of your mind?" I touched her forehead, and she didn't dodge. "You're wasting a great future; you'll regret it."
"The scores I get are my own decision," she asserted, qualifying her choice.
"Are you serious?" I put down my milk, straightened my posture, and looked at her.
"Yes, I'm not joking."
"Why do you have to follow me?" She lowered her head slightly, and I quickly added, "Hey, no lying and no silence."
"I... I'm scared alone," she murmured.
If it were now, I would know that she had mild Autism and social anxiety back then, but at that time, I was ignorant and felt deeply moved, filled with a sense of being relied upon. She was like a clingy white rabbit, and my heart softened instantly.
"Alright, if you want to follow me, then let's go together. You choose the school; I don't mind. Pick a major you like." I wrapped my arm around her shoulder and said cheerfully.
"Okay!" Her smile grew brighter.
But to be honest, we were still too naive; we didn't expect our wish to be companions would face so much opposition and criticism.
During the mock application process, Xu Wenmo and I decided to apply to Qingdao Private College together. Not long after we submitted the forms, Xu Wenmo was called into the office by our homeroom teacher. She returned over an hour later, followed by me.
"Lin Ye, I know you and Xu Wenmo are close, but the college entrance exam is a big deal that affects your whole life. You can't drag Xu Wenmo to a second-rate private college," the homeroom teacher said earnestly from behind his desk. Other teachers chimed in as if I had coerced Xu Wenmo into this decision. "If you want to be in the same school as her, you can repeat a year and work harder. Maybe you can get into the school she's attending or at least one in the same city. Her scores are more than enough for Beijing; there are plenty of schools there with lower cutoffs. Why must you be in the same school? Do you realize you're holding her back? You could ruin her life!"
Now, I no longer feared the homeroom teacher. I straightened my back and calmly replied, "Where she goes is her own decision; it has nothing to do with me."
"Lin Ye, how can you be so selfish..."
After half an hour of rambling on without changing my stance, the homeroom teacher left with a grim expression saying, "I'll tell her parents about this honestly; think it over!"
The homeroom teacher kept his word. That night when I returned to the villa, I was met with Liu Ya's storm.
"Come upstairs," Liu Ya shot me a glance and coldly addressed Xu Wenmo.
Xu Wenmo lowered her head and followed her upstairs.
I anxiously wandered in the living room, the sound of arguing, or rather, Liu Ya's one-sided accusations, continuously seeping out from behind the door.
"…You have disappointed me so much. I never expected you to be so willful and reckless. If you were my student, I would advise you to drop out because you are wasting your parents' hard work and precious educational resources… Is this your ambition? Do you even deserve the books you read every day? You are wasting your own life, do you understand? My daughter, Liu Ya, is such a disrespectful person. If I had known this would happen, I would have preferred not to have given birth to you… You have embarrassed me completely… I have suffered so much for you over the years, and you don't even care about my feelings. Are you heartless? Or are you just too foolish… Passing on my genes to you is nothing short of a humiliation for me!"
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