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墨書 Inktalez
After that day, my life changed completely.
Every morning when I woke up, it took me half an hour to muster the strength to get out of bed. Even the simplest tasks, like washing my face, left me breathless, and my hands trembled when I reached for my water cup. The woman in the mirror looked haggard, with dark circles under her eyes that seemed impossible to erase.
I forced myself to go to work, but during an important client meeting, I fainted. When I came to, my supervisor stood at my bedside with a troubled expression. “Anxin, you should take some time off,” he said.
I managed a bitter smile as I signed my resignation letter. Once a vibrant white-collar elite, I could barely stand now.
My home quickly descended into chaos. I lacked the energy to tidy up and could only curl up on the sofa, staring blankly at the wall. My phone buzzed incessantly with updates from Lin Weiwei’s social media; she was dining at a Michelin three-star restaurant with Gu Ting and posting vacation photos from the Maldives that pierced my heart.
I once thought of myself as Gu Ting’s fiancée, but now I realized I was merely a dispensable substitute.
When I returned to the hospital for a follow-up examination, the doctor’s grave expression was terrifying. “Miss Song, I’m sorry… Your test results indicate early symptoms of acute leukemia.”
I felt as if I had fallen into an ice pit. “What does that mean?”
The doctor sighed. “The extensive bone marrow donation has caused irreversible damage to your body. The cancer cells have already spread; I recommend you be hospitalized for treatment immediately.”
I clutched the diagnosis report tightly, feeling cold all over. The doctor continued speaking, but I couldn’t absorb any of it. Holding back tears, I asked, “How long do I have left?”
“With aggressive treatment, you might have about six months to a year.”
A year.
I repeated that number in my mind. A year ago, Gu Ting had whispered in my ear to take care of him for the rest of our lives; now, my own life was nearing its end.
Lin Weiwei had been abroad for ten years, and her sudden return home was not out of homesickness, but because she had been diagnosed with leukemia.
Gu Ting, in his desperation to save her, spared no expense in searching for a matching donor. And I, I was merely a hapless pawn in this unfolding drama.
While packing my things, a photograph slipped out from the drawer. It was an engagement photo of Gu Ting and me; he had his arms wrapped around my waist, a gentle smile gracing his face. I stared at that picture for a long time before finally tearing it to shreds and tossing it into the trash bin.
In the dead of night, the side effects of chemotherapy left me in unbearable pain. I curled up in bed, my pajamas soaked with cold sweat, my stomach churning violently. Trembling, I picked up my phone and sent Gu Ting a message: "I'm feeling really unwell. Can you come keep me company?"
The message sank into silence. I stared at the screen for half an hour, waiting until my eyes grew so sore that I could barely keep them open. Suddenly, my phone vibrated, and my heart raced. Was it Gu Ting replying?
I hurriedly opened the notification, only to find it was just a medication reminder from the hospital.
By chance, I scrolled through Lin Weiwei's social media and saw a photo she posted: "Thank you, Ting Ge, for the starry sky projector. My room is no longer afraid of the dark." The accompanying image was of a beautifully designed projector.
Gu Ting's comment followed closely: "My Princess Weiwei deserves the best."
A wave of nausea washed over me as I rushed to the bathroom to dry heave. Once again, I dialed Gu Ting's number, but it rang out with no answer. The empty room echoed only with my labored breaths.
Ten years ago, Gu Ting was just a fresh graduate intern. Back then, he was full of ambition but had nothing to his name; it was I who stood by him through those toughest days. We shared instant noodles in our cramped rental and savored oden from convenience stores together.
I remember the first time he received his project bonus; he bought a cheap ring.
Holding my hand, he said, "Anxin, when I have money, I will definitely buy you the most expensive diamond ring."
I naively thought that after waiting for so many years, I would finally receive his proposal.
But what I got instead was the news of Lin Weiwei returning home.
"Wei Wei is my sister, who I've grown up with. Don't think too much about it," he explained, "You are my true love."
But now?
His true love is enduring pain in solitude while he is accompanying his sister.
I forced myself to get up from the bed, reaching for the anti-nausea medication on the bedside table; the cold pills scraped painfully against my throat.
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