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After waking up, Liu Jian asked me, "Xiao Wan, what did the doctor say?"
I smiled and shook my head. "Nothing."
He didn't want me to know about his condition, and how could I tell him that his illness was worse than I imagined?
That evening, Liu Jian said he wanted to eat an apple.
I peeled an apple for him.
As soon as I finished peeling it, he wanted to eat.
I handed it to him, but he shook his head. "I can't reach it; you feed me."
I laughed and stuffed a piece of apple into his mouth. "Liu Jian, you're a grown man; you still need someone to feed you."
He pouted playfully, "I want you to feed me."
With no other choice, I cut the apple into small pieces and fed him with a toothpick.
He looked at me and smiled, "Xiao Wan, it's so nice to have you."
I returned his smile.
Liu Jian, having you by my side makes me very happy.
On the third day, Liu Jian started chemotherapy.
The treatment was painful; he felt nauseous and vomited every day, unable to eat anything.
He was losing weight rapidly.
Yet he still maintained an optimistic attitude.
He said, "Xiao Wan, look, I can finish a whole bowl of rice now."
Seeing his sunken cheeks made my heart ache.
But he smiled at me and said, "Xiao Wan, don't cry; I'll get better."
"Okay."
I held the bowl in my arms, eating while tears streamed down my face.
Liu Jian, you must get better.
I'm waiting to go back to Chengdu with you, to get married and have children together.
On the fourth day, Liu Jian said he didn't want to stay in the hospital anymore.
He wanted to go out for a walk.
I took him for a walk in the nearby park. He held my hand as we strolled slowly along the park's path. Suddenly, he said, "Xiao Wan, if one day I leave you..."
"Don't be sad; you need to take care of yourself." I covered his mouth. "Liu Jian, don't say things like that."
He held my hand and looked at me. "Xiao Wan, I'm saying if."
"If that day really comes, you have to promise me to live well."
I nodded with red-rimmed eyes. "Okay."
He hugged me tightly. "Xiao Wan, I love you."
I hugged him back. "Liu Jian, I love you too."
On the fifth day, Liu Jian started running a fever. The doctor said it was a normal postoperative reaction. I stayed by his side without leaving for a moment. I helped cool him down, wiped his body, and fed him medicine. He grasped my hand and drifted into a drowsy sleep.
On the sixth day, Liu Jian's condition improved. He was discharged from the hospital. I packed his things and took him home. His mother prepared a lot of delicious food for us.
Liu Jian smiled and said, "Xiao Wan, thank you."
I shook my head. "No need to thank me."
His mother wiped her tears nearby.
Liu Jian said, "Mom, don't cry."
"I'm fine."
But his mother cried even harder.
Liu Jian reached out his hand to me. "Xiao Wan, come here."
I walked over, and he reached out to embrace me. "Xiao Wan, I will get better," he said softly.
I hugged him back. "Yes, Liu Jian, you will definitely get better."
On the seventh day, Liu Jian started to experience diarrhea.
On the eighth day, he began to feel dizzy.
On the ninth day, he started coughing up blood.
On the tenth day, he fell into a coma.
...
He had been fighting his illness.
I stayed by his side.
We traveled to many places.
We saw countless sights.
We tasted a variety of foods.
But his condition never improved.
I was terrified.
I feared he would leave me.
I feared I would lose him.
I began searching online for information about colon cancer.
I learned that in the late stages, cancer cells spread to other organs.
At that point, patients suffer greatly.
In the end, they slowly lose their lives.
I couldn't bear to read further.
I couldn't imagine what I would do if Liu Jian left me.
I couldn't fathom how I would live without him.
I couldn't imagine...
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