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Rise from the Ashes
墨書 Inktalez
I was an orphan, growing up in a welfare home. There were many children in the home, and while we sometimes quarreled, more often we huddled together for warmth. We all understood that only by sticking together could we avoid being bullied by the other bad kids.
The day the Xue couple came to choose a child was bright and sunny. I was squatting in a corner of the yard, feeding a stray cat.
“ Shanshan!” The director approached with a smile. “Mr. Xue and Mrs. Xue are here to see you.”
I set down the cat food, brushed off the crumbs from my hands, and followed the director to the reception room.
The Xue couple were regulars, often volunteering at the welfare home and bringing lots of delicious treats for the children. They had a son named Xue Ming, who was our age and studying at university in another city.
“Little friend,” Aunt Xue said, holding my hand gently, “would you like to be our daughter?”
Uncle Xue looked at me with eager anticipation.
I shook my head.
Aunt Xue seemed surprised. “Why don’t you want to? Is there something about us that isn’t good enough?”
Before I could respond, a boy sitting nearby spoke up: “No, she’s great.”
He stood up, walked over to me, and leaned slightly forward to look into my eyes. “I’m Xue Ming; I’ll be your brother from now on.”
“Do you want to be my sister?”
Aunt Xue smiled and added, “Our Xue Ming is quite exceptional; he’s even the president of the student council at school.”
Uncle Xue encouraged me as well: “ Shanshan, don’t worry; we will treat you well.”
I pressed my lips together and said firmly, “I don’t want to.”
Aunt Xue asked me gently, “Can you tell Auntie why you don’t want to?”
“I don’t want to be your son’s sister.”
Xue Ming looked surprised. “Why not?”
I lowered my eyelashes and whispered, “I just don’t like it; there’s no reason.”
Aunt Xue sighed softly and sat back down beside Uncle Xue. He wrapped his arm around her shoulder to comfort her, saying, "It's alright, we'll pick someone we like again."
Xue Ming furrowed his brows in thought for a moment before speaking up, "Let's go with her."
Aunt Xue asked in confusion, "Why her?"
Xue Ming pointed at me, "She looks the most like the little girl you described."
Uncle Xue and Aunt Xue exchanged glances, then looked down at me, their expressions lighting up with joy. They said, "Then it's settled; it must be her."
But I had no desire to go with them.
I recalled the day I was reborn when I almost got adopted. In my previous life, shortly after being adopted, the couple's child passed away. They treated me as a substitute, projecting their longing for their lost child onto me. Unfortunately, I wasn't their real child and couldn't reciprocate their love.
I gradually became rebellious—smoking, drinking, fighting, and causing chaos in school. When they tried to discipline me, I would deliberately cut my wrist with a knife and threaten to kill myself. They were terrified and could only plead with me not to do anything foolish.
Later, during the college entrance examination, I scored zero points and laughed maniacally at their frustrated expressions. Eventually, I was taken away by the police for robbery and assault.
When they came to the police station to see me, begging me to reform and insisting that they would always be my family, I spat at them and laughed, saying, "Go die!"
They were so enraged that they both ended up hospitalized with heart issues. After being discharged, they applied to the court to terminate the adoption relationship, no longer wanting to deal with an ungrateful child like me. But by then, I was already in a juvenile detention center.
After they abandoned me, there was no one left in this world who cared about me.
I gradually faded out of their lives.
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