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墨書 Inktalez
Mei Shuang slept soundly until Dawn, and it was the most restful sleep she had experienced in days.
When she opened her eyes, she felt all her fatigue vanish, leaving her refreshed and invigorated.
Through the window, she saw Little Nun already hard at work, sweeping the fallen leaves with great diligence.
She quickly got up, washed up briefly, and walked over. "Let me help you; you should take a break."
Little Nun was somewhat surprised and shook her head with a smile. "This is my duty; there is no need for you to assist."
Mei Shuang replied, "What do you mean by assistance? I'm not just a guest here. You've been sweeping for a while; let me finish up..."
Unable to refuse Mei Shuang, Little Nun went to fetch a broom for her.
Taking the broom, Mei Shuang began to sweep expertly. After finishing, she and Little Nun went to the spring on the back mountain to fetch water. Little Nun felt quite embarrassed as Mei Shuang took on half of her daily chores. "If you keep this up, Abbot will have something to say about me."
As Mei Shuang helped pour the water into the barrel, she wiped the beads of sweat from her forehead and smiled. "What does it matter? It's all the same work regardless of who does it. Besides, doing these chores in a temple is also a form of cultivation; why not enjoy it?"
Little Nun said no more and clasped her hands together to chant "Amitabha."
From outside the window, Abbot could hear their conversation and couldn't help but close her eyes and fold her hands in quiet prayer. "Goodness, goodness."
She turned to look at Chu Xiruo, who had been kneeling in front of the Buddha statue reciting scriptures since early morning. "Do you think she has changed?"
Chu Xiruo kept her eyes closed and replied softly, "In the past, she was temperamental and ostentatious; how could she have done such menial tasks? Apart from being obedient in front of Empress Dowager, even the noble young ladies were beneath her notice. Her half-sister was treated like a servant with no sisterly affection at all. Looking at her now, she is straightforward and has shed all pretensions of being a wealthy lady. If it weren't for that face, who would guess that before us stands Lin Yuxiang, once the pampered daughter of the Left Chancellor, known as Qianjin Meishuang? She used to plot against me constantly, yet now it seems all past grievances have vanished; she treats me like a friend, which I can hardly believe myself. When a person changes their nature, it's as if they are reborn..."
Abbot nodded appreciatively. "You are right; it must have been difficult for you to endure her past criticisms while being confined by Empress Dowager in the Buddha Hall. It seems that after so many days of reciting scriptures day and night, you have found some peace and do not hold a grudge against her..."
Chu Xiruo stiffened slightly, slowly opened her eyes, put down the scripture in her hands, looked up at the majestic figure of the Buddha, and sighed softly. "Abbot, although I haven't practiced for long, I have gained something. But after all, I am still human; my heart cannot be completely free of selfishness..."
Abbot frowned slightly, clearly not understanding what she meant.
With her hands clasped together, Chu Xiruo bowed deeply before the statue and said lightly as she rose, "Before the Buddha, I can speak my mind... Since many years ago when I met Lord Luo, that moment when he promised me a lifetime as his wife often resurfaces in my mind. At that time, he was the invincible warrior on the battlefield known as Lord Luo, while I was merely a young lady from a noble family; we were deeply in love and could be considered a perfect match. He promised me a lifetime as his wife, and I always looked forward to that day..."
As she spoke, Chu Xiruo fell silent for a moment, seemingly lost in thought. When she finally spoke again, her voice had taken on a slightly hoarse tone. "I always thought time would stand still for that moment. He stabilized the border, and even though we often could not see each other, my heart was always sweet because there was a beautiful wait deep inside. But I never expected that he would ultimately transform from Lord Luo into the Emperor. The wife of the Emperor is not someone anyone can become; even if he insists on me entering the palace, I cannot and dare not..."
At this point, Chu Xiruo bowed deeply again. "The major affairs of the court are connected to the inner palace. Empress Dowager, you are wise; confining me to Buddha Hall is ostensibly to make way for the new Empress, but in reality, it is a form of protection for me."
Hearing this, Mei Shuang outside the window was stunned.
Even the Abbot was taken aback and exclaimed, "Jinghui..."
"My family has fallen apart; I have no one to rely on. Entering the palace cannot make me the wife of the former Lord Luo; instead, I would have to compete for favor with those women. My temperament simply cannot survive in the palace. If I cannot stand in the inner palace, it will inevitably distract the Emperor's attention, which will worry him over time. The Empress Dowager naturally would not allow my existence in the palace..."
The Abbot remained silent; Chu Xiruo's ability to see this step indeed showed her thoughtfulness.
She was at a loss for words when Chu Xiruo continued, her voice tinged with sorrow and helplessness. "I know that if I disappear, the Emperor will surely miss me. Every time I think of how he will always remember me warms my heart enough that even if we can never meet again and I spend my life with Azure Lamp and Ancient Buddha, it will still be indelibly etched in his heart, making this life worthwhile. But I never expected that it was Mei Shuang who destroyed all of this; it was precisely because of that untimely meeting that I lost even this last bit of warmth in my heart..."
Mei Shuang stood outside, dumbfounded.
Destroyed? Did she ruin Chu Xiruo's hopes by encouraging the Emperor to seek her out? Wasn't she trying to help them?
Indeed, the Abbot asked, "Jinghui, why do you say that?"
Chu Xiruo let out a long breath, her tone growing heavy with an infinite sense of melancholy and heartbreak. "The Emperor came to see me. But Abbot, do you know? In the Emperor's eyes, I did not see my own reflection... At that moment, I realized that there was someone else in his heart. I have tasted the bitterness of despair..."
Upon hearing these words, Mei Shuang's heart suddenly raced, and her palms seemed to sweat as she nearly lost grip on the broom she held.
The Abbot fell silent once more.
Such matters often rely on personal intuition and are difficult for others to understand. Moreover, similar situations are often clearer to outsiders than to those involved; yet now the one involved was painfully aware while she could only believe.
She sighed deeply, clasped her hands together, and comforted her. "It's good that you've seen clearly; it saves you from heartbreak over love affairs. The Empress Dowager may be right; although she has separated you from the Emperor, at least she can protect you completely. Historically, many women in the inner palace have had ulterior motives; even with the Emperor's favor, many do not end well. Jinghui, since you have come to understand this and can let go—he is ultimately the ruler of all under heaven and will not stop for anyone..."
Chu Xiruo's clasped hands trembled slightly; bitterness filled her throat as she quietly said, "He will not stop for anyone? ...Abbot, I... understand..."
"Alright, you've knelt for so long, get up now. I won't speak of what happened here. Just stay at ease..."
Taking advantage of the fact that Chu Xiruo and the Abbot had not yet come out, Mei Shuang quickly hid while holding a broom.
When she ran to the back of the house, Mei Shuang felt her heart racing uncontrollably. It was as if she had done something wrong; she glanced back to see no one following her before finally putting down the broom and finding a clean spot to sit.
Looking up, she saw the back mountain.
Although the weather was still chilly, the mountain already showed signs of early spring, with faint green shoots emerging from the previously bare ground.
Mei Shuang rested her elbows on her knees, propping her chin in her hands as she gazed at the back mountain, but her ears echoed with every word spoken by Chu Xiruo.
This Chu Xiruo appeared gentle like an orchid but was wise within. Her temperament was calm, and she had a deep understanding of matters—she was not a woman to be compared with lightly. Previously, if it weren't for the Empress Dowager's favoritism and her prominent family background, how could Mei Shuang ever compete with such a woman? It truly was overestimating herself.
What man wouldn't be captivated by such a woman? It was only natural for Xiao Luo to like her; however, she now claimed that there was "someone else" in Xiao Luo's eyes—the man whom she promised to be his "one and only" wife. Had he really moved on so quickly?
Mei Shuang sighed deeply, feeling a chill wash over her.
Who could this "other person" be? What kind of woman could surpass both beauty and wisdom like Chu Xiruo? Even she herself lacked confidence to think that merely based on a guessed "shadow," she could decisively leave behind her beloved "Lord Luo"?
...
From afar, the Abbot spotted Mei Shuang sitting on a rock, lost in thought as she stared at the back mountain.
Now dressed in ordinary commoner's clothing, Mei Shuang rested her hands on her chin, seemingly immersed in memories and appearing troubled. The Abbot had stood beside her for quite some time without her noticing.
Earlier, when she caught sight of that disappearing corner of clothing from the window, he knew that this child must have heard Chu Xiruo's words and likely also heard Chu Xiruo's grievances towards her.
Alas, what a fateful entanglement!
Previously, this Mei Shuang had gone to great lengths to remove Chu Xiruo in order to win over the Emperor, causing lovers to be separated. Now she hoped for those two people she had torn apart to reconcile, unaware that the world had changed in their absence.
She really couldn't understand. Had her nature changed so much after being reborn? Even her feelings for the Emperor had altered?
Abbot lightly coughed, and Mei Shuang suddenly woke up, instinctively getting up and feeling embarrassed as she said to Abbot, "Master, why are you here?"
"It's time for vegetarian meals," Abbot said kindly, looking at Mei Shuang's slightly flushed cheeks from the mountain breeze. "Aren't you afraid of catching a cold just sitting here?"
Mei Shuang shook her head. "It's fine, just for a little while."
Abbot carefully examined Mei Shuang's complexion and said, "You have a weak constitution and need to learn to take care of your body. You mustn't catch a cold. Also, there are certain dishes you should avoid eating too much of. I'll make a list for you to follow when you go back..."
"Oh? Master, why?" Mei Shuang asked curiously.
As Abbot walked back, he replied, "This is a problem from your childhood. Plus, now that you've been injured, it's like adding insult to injury. It may not show on the surface for now, but you need to take extra care to prevent future issues..."
"Problems from my childhood?" Mei Shuang paused in her steps. "Master, did you know me before?"
Abbot realized he had said too much and pretended not to hear Mei Shuang's question, casually changing the topic. "Of course not. The vegetarian meal is ready; hurry and eat."
After saying this, he turned and headed towards Buddha Hall.
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