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墨書 Inktalez
The sound of the phone vibrating on the sofa was always faint, and the screen flickered to reveal the name Park Chan-yeol. Hogga glanced at Anna, who was still dazed in the bathroom; she didn't hear the subtle noise.
Hogga smirked, picked up the phone, and answered the call.
"Hello, Anna..." Park Chan-yeol's voice came through, sounding much calmer, as if he had thought long and hard before making this call.
Hogga chuckled and said, "Sorry, she's in the bathroom..."
Park Chan-yeol sounded shocked, "You are Yun Qian..."
"Yes."
----------------------------
When Anna emerged from the bathroom, Hogga was still sitting there. His laptop had already been packed away, and he was leisurely sipping a cup of hot water.
"Sorry for being a bit rude," Anna said, calming herself as she took a seat in a chair some distance away from Hogga.
"Did you find your mother?" Hogga set down his cup.
Anna smiled helplessly. "It's not so much that I found her; I just ran into her."
Hogga smiled back and said, "By the way, someone called you earlier. You didn't hear it, and I didn't call you." He handed the phone to Anna.
"Who was it?" Anna looked at the phone but saw no missed calls displayed.
"I accidentally answered, but I didn't say anything and quickly hung up. You should call back," Hogga said.
"Okay." Anna nodded. Seeing Park Chan-yeol's name, she hesitated for a moment, worried it might be something important, and called back. After the tone ended, no one picked up.
Anna smiled bitterly and set her phone aside. "It was probably a wrong number..."
"By the way, I've never told you my real name, have I?"
Anna was a bit surprised. "Why are you suddenly bringing this up?"
"Today I'll tell you my real name," Hogga said with a smirk. "My name is Park Yoon-chan."
"Park... Yoon-chan." Anna said the unfamiliar name for the first time. "I think I'm still used to calling you Hogga."
"That's up to you. But today, I wanted to tell you my name."
"So you also have the surname Park..." Anna chuckled helplessly.
Hogga glanced at the time, stood up, and said, "I have to go."
"Thank you so much," Anna stood up to bid him farewell.
"However, there's something I still need to say: You and Andy are already from different worlds now. Don't get tangled up in it anymore. You have more important things to do, understand?"
Anna nodded and replied, "Got it, thank you."
"There's no need to thank me. I'm leaving."
After saying that, Hogga left, and as the door closed, Anna had some strange thoughts flash through her mind, but they slipped away before she could grasp them. She felt a bit of a headache; too much had happened that day, and she needed some time to process it all.
Her phone vibrated again. Anna thought it was Park Chan-yeol replying, so she quickly picked it up. However, the name on the screen was not Park Chan-yeol's but Lee Kwang-soo's.
"Hello, Brother Kwangsoo," Anna said.
"What's wrong? You sound lethargic. I have some good news for you," Lee Kwang-soo's voice was somewhat excited.
"What good news?"
"Do you know Zhang Yuanxiao?"
"Yeah, what about him?" Anna rubbed her temples.
"He heard that you left because you were accused of plagiarizing the Christmas Special idea. He has already talked privately with Brother Jae-seok and mentioned that you told him about your creative concept a long time ago. Brother Jae-seok said he would go see Miao PD with Zhang Yuanxiao tomorrow."
"What? When did I tell him that?" Anna couldn't recall this at all.
"He said it was during lunch in the cafeteria."
"Is that so..." Anna thought carefully, her mind almost feeling like it would explode. "I think there might have been something like that."
"Anyway, no matter what, this will finally clear your name, and we can celebrate Christmas properly."
Anna smiled weakly; she had no mood to celebrate Christmas now.
"Let's wait for the results to come out. We don't know what will happen yet, so there's no point in getting our hopes up too high," she said.
"Hey, what's wrong with you, Anna? This isn't like you; you’re never this pessimistic," Lee Kwang-soo remarked.
"Yeah, how did I end up like this?" Anna said, suddenly recalling something. "Brother Kwangsoo, do you remember the last time you and Brother Jae-seok came to my house and met Ms. Han Yoon-soo?"
"I remember."
"You said you thought she looked familiar, right? You mentioned having seen her somewhere before. Do you have any impression?"
"I just can't recall, but she really does look familiar," Lee Kwang-soo replied.
"How could she not look familiar..." Anna murmured. They had been neighbors when they were younger. Kwang-soo was a few years older than her, and he must have seen Han Yoon-soo when she was pregnant.
"What did you say?" Kwang-soo didn't catch that.
"Nothing," Anna said. "By the way, when does Brother Jae-seok have time recently? I want to see him and chat."
"After recording Infinite Challenge on Thursday, he should be free starting Friday since it's Christmas break. What do you want to talk to Brother Jae-seok about? It’s not about deciding on the Infinite Challenge Task Force, is it? Just wait a bit; maybe we can sort things out here on Running Man. You might just make it in time for this year's year-end review and become a PD."
"No," Anna said. "I just have some questions for Brother Jae-seok."
"Alright, tomorrow is Monday. I'll ask Brother Jae-seok when I see him and let you know."
"Okay, thank you, Brother Kwangsoo."
When Han Yoon-soo arrived at Anna's door again, Anna still did not open the door. She had some things in her heart that needed to be sorted out. This door to 'mother' had been locked for too long; the lock had rusted and was not so easy to reopen, allowing light to come in.
With only two days left until Christmas, most people had already taken their holidays. The small shops along the street that were run by individuals closed much earlier than usual. The decorations and music of Christmas filled the streets and alleys, and everyone wore a look of happiness on their faces. Regardless of poverty or wealth, during Christmas, happiness was shared by all.
After thinking it over, she decided not to invite Brother Jae-seok out. After all, the people of the Republic of Korea could recognize his voice and it would cause unnecessary chaos and news.
Anna bought some oranges and drove her little car, which she hadn't used in a long time, to Jae-seok's house.
"Oh, Anna, come in. Thank you for the oranges," Roh Jeong-eun said warmly as she invited Anna inside.
Zhihao was sitting on the floor in the living room playing with a toy train. Jae-seok wasn't surprised since Kwangsoo had mentioned that Anna was coming.
Roh Jeong-eun brewed a cup of black tea and placed it in front of Anna, who nodded in thanks. Zhihao called for his mother, and Roh Jeong-eun exchanged a few pleasantries with Anna before going to play with Zhihao.
"Kwangsoo said you wanted to talk to me about something, what is it?" Jae-seok asked.
Anna thought for a moment and replied, "Brother Jae-seok, what kind of person is Han Yoon-soo?"
"Why are you suddenly asking about this? You seem very curious about Han Yoon-soo," Jae-seok said.
"Yes, he has been very nice to me, so I want to know more," Anna smiled as she spoke.
Yoo Jae-suk pondered for a moment and recalled, "Han Yoon-soo was my classmate in first year of middle school. She sat two rows in front of me. Back then, she was very pretty and looked a bit like you did when you had long hair." Yoo Jae-suk chuckled and continued, "Many boys liked her, but she had a boyfriend who was an upperclassman from our school. That upperclassman was good at sports, came from a good family, and was handsome; they were always an enviable couple. By the time we reached third year of middle school, Han Yoon-soo and I were no longer in the same class. However... it seemed like right before graduation, Han Yoon-soo and that upperclassman were having some issues; I don't know if they ended up breaking up... Later on, I heard she got married, but the groom wasn’t that upperclassman; it was someone else whose name seemed to be... Zheng..." Yoo Jae-suk's memory became somewhat hazy.
“Zheng Hyunwoo…,” Anna said calmly.
“Ah, yes, that seems to be the name. It seems that he was in the same class as Han Yoon-soo in the third year of middle school. There were rumors among classmates that he liked Han Yoon-soo. I never expected that Han Yoon-soo would actually marry him. He is quite plain-looking, doesn’t talk much, and his family background seems pretty average. Maybe he treats Han Yoon-soo very well, which moved her,” Jae-seok said.
“Brother Jae-seok, did you attend Ms. Han Yoon-soo’s wedding?”
Jae-seok shook his head and smiled, saying, “No, it seems no one was notified about her wedding. At that time, Zheng Hyunwoo didn’t inform many people either. You know how it is; beautiful girls have so many suitors, so they tend to be a bit proud. It’s understandable that she didn’t notify us.”
“And then?”
“What happened next?”
“I remember seeing her once right after she got married; she was already pregnant and looked a bit haggard. I greeted her, but Zheng Hyunwoo didn’t seem happy to see me talking to Han Yoon-soo, so he hurriedly left. After that, I haven’t seen her again; I don’t know where she went. Until six years ago, when I ran into her by chance at a mall. Han Yoon-soo seemed to be doing well and even advised me a bit. I just didn’t expect you two knew each other; fate is truly wonderful,” Yoo Jae-suk said with a smile.
However, Anna couldn’t bring herself to smile. Seeing Anna’s expression, Yoo Jae-suk gradually lost his smile as well and sensed that something was off.
“Anna, has something happened between you and Han Yoon-soo?” Yoo Jae-suk asked cautiously.
Anna looked at Jae-seok, took a deep breath, and said, “Brother Jae-seok, can you keep this a secret for me? There are some things I don’t know how to handle anymore.” As she spoke, her nose tinged with sadness; she had never experienced paternal love and even felt some resentment towards her deceased father now. Before truly meeting Yoo Jae-suk, she had learned about life from this distant figure. Now, her trust in him had become like that of a father; in moments of confusion, she felt he was like a lamp illuminating an escape route.
Only then did Yoo Jae-suk realize the seriousness of the situation; it wasn’t as simple as Anna initially described.
“Anna, please tell me what happened,” Yoo Jae-suk said earnestly.
“Brother Jae-seok, the child in Han Yoon-soo’s belly when you saw her pregnant is me…”
"What?!" Yoo Jae-suk could hardly believe his ears. "Anna, how is this possible? But when I saw you and Han Yoon-soo at your house... you clearly weren't mother and daughter..."
Anna smiled bitterly and said, "Yeah, I didn't know at that time. I only found out a couple of days ago."
"What do you mean you didn't know? Why wouldn't you know?" Yoo Jae-suk asked.
Anna lowered her head, looking at the red tea in her hands, the steam making her thoughts feel a bit hazy. "Because, as soon as Andy and I were born, Han Yoon-soo left us."
"What? How could that be?" Yoo Jae-suk was equally astonished. Although he had heard quite a bit about the events from years ago, he wasn't very familiar with Han Yoon-soo, so he had no idea about the incredible developments that followed. He never dreamed that Anna would be Han Yoon-soo's daughter. When did the world become so small? People he hadn't seen in years or thought had little connection to him turned out to have so many ties. "Kwang-soo has been your neighbor since childhood, right?"
Anna nodded, and Yoo Jae-suk suddenly realized, "No wonder Kwang-soo said Han Yoon-soo looked familiar. I thought he was joking... Now that I think about it, they must have met when they were young."
"Brother Jae-seok, you know, even though I've complained, to avoid living in resentment and thinking that she would never come back anyway, I've always told myself that my mother was dead, which is why she didn't come looking for us... Growing up was so hard; I started working secretly when I was just over ten years old to earn some money. Eating a bit of meat felt like a huge celebration... Everything was done on my own; even when I got sick, no one ever took care of me..." Anna said, holding back emotions she had suppressed for so long until they finally burst into tears, dropping onto the table.
Roh Jeong-eun seemed to have heard something from afar and glanced over with a sigh.
"Anna, don't do this. Everyone has their own struggles. I believe the questions you came to ask me today must have a reason behind them. I trust that a mother wouldn't heartlessly abandon her children unless absolutely necessary; that's just human nature."
"But the reality is that we were abandoned, weren't we? And she hasn't come looking for us for over twenty years. If it weren't for this encounter, would we have never met in this lifetime?"
"Anna, you can choose not to love her or recognize her, but you don't have the right to hate her. Do you understand? Don't hold onto resentment; otherwise, you'll be imprisoning yourself."
"No right?" Anna asked.
"Yes, Anna, you don't have that right. Even though parents have obligations to support their children, ultimately, each person is an independent individual. Everyone has the right to choose their own life path, including your mother. Anna, your life has always been independent from the start; don't let the sudden emergence of an unsettling connection trouble you. Just let things unfold naturally. If you've said too many hurtful things to Han Yoon-soo, then I'm sure your own heart will feel uneasy."
"Brother Jae-seok, what kind of person is Zheng Hyunwoo?"
Jae-seok thought for a moment, looking somewhat troubled.
Anna noticed his discomfort and said, "Brother Jae-seok, just speak honestly."
"To be honest, at that time, no one expected that Han Yoon-soo would end up marrying him. He is quite unremarkable and has a somewhat reclusive personality."
Anna helplessly raised the corners of her mouth. "Yeah, if my father were truly a good person, Han Yoon-soo wouldn't have left him or abandoned us. He wouldn't have ignored us for over twenty years."
"Anna, while I'm not always right, I've lived many more years than you and have seen a bit more. I don't know if you'll take my words to heart, but I still want to say that regarding Han Yoon-soo, try to maintain a calm mindset. If one day you can resolve your feelings, you can think about reconnecting. Just don't say hurtful things out of momentary anger to harm her; that will only hurt yourself as well. Do you understand?"
"I... don't want to see her right now..."
"Then don't see her. When you're ready to think things through, you can sit down and have a good talk. Also, Anna, has Kwang-soo told you about how Zhang Yuanxiao from Running Man can prove that you didn't plagiarize?"
Anna nodded. "Brother Kwangsoo has already informed me."
"That's good. Wait for the situation to resolve and get back to work. If you don't keep yourself busy with work, it's easy to become negative and overthink."
"But Brother Jae-seok, I don't want to work for now."
Yoo Jae-suk sighed and looked at Anna seriously. "Anna, on this journey of life, there will be much pain and many twists and turns. However, as long as your dreams are still alive, you can move forward. Otherwise, you'll just be stuck in place, entangled at a crossroads without making progress, which will only make you feel more confused."
Anna thought for a moment and silently nodded. "I don't know if I can handle those jobs in my current state."
"At worst, we can just start over. As long as you're willing to try. Also, Anna, human nature isn't that easy to change. Han Yoon-soo was always a kind person, and I believe that hasn't changed. Just like you told me about your dreams, I believe that hasn't changed either."
Anna understood what Jae-seok was trying to convey. She looked at Yoo Jae-suk gratefully and said, "Thank you, Brother Jae-seok."
After leaving Jae-seok's house, Anna drove back to her home and parked the car downstairs. She kept Jae-seok's words in mind; all the right and wrong perceptions were merely different perspectives.
Even between parents and children, there are their own stances.
This emotional knot would take time to unravel. After parking the car, Anna noticed the nearby supermarket still had its lights on. She walked in and bought a pack of cigarettes, even though she had never smoked before.
Sitting on a stone by the roadside, she took one out but realized she didn't have a lighter. So she hurried back inside to buy a cheap lighter. The cashier looked at her with a strange expression, clearly seeing she was inexperienced with smoking, but silently accepted her money. Anna returned to the cold stone where she had been sitting earlier. The weather was really cold; soon the chill seeped through her clothes to her backside and waist. She shivered and realized this place wasn't suitable for sitting idly anymore, so she slowly went back to the car, adjusted the seat for comfort, and reclined slightly.
Taking the cigarette box from her pocket, she pulled out the one she hadn't lit earlier. Imitating Cat's smoking posture, she placed it between her lips, opened the lighter, and carefully lit it. Taking a puff, a sharp spiciness rushed into her nose, causing her to sit up abruptly and cough violently until tears streamed down her face.
Wasn't it said that cigarettes and alcohol were the best remedies for sorrow? If she couldn't drink alcohol, why did smoking feel like inhaling chili water?
Feeling somewhat dejected as she watched the cigarette continue to burn, Anna shook her head. Luckily, there was a bottle of unfinished mineral water in the car. She unscrewed the cap and dropped in the cigarette that she had only taken one puff from; the water instantly turned a murky yellowish color, which was somewhat nauseating. Anna stared at it for a moment before capping it again and setting it aside as she continued to lie back down.
Looking at the dim sky outside, Christmas was just around the corner. As a child, what she looked forward to most during Christmas was wearing new clothes in a small warm home with a hearty dinner and a modest yet beautiful Christmas tree, surrounded by family...
She had never had such a home before, and now it was even more nonexistent. That home had never truly existed; thus, there was nothing to speak of falling apart.
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