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墨書 Inktalez
"Qian Fan, do you remember?"
"Back then, I would wait for you outside while you were in class."
"Sometimes, if I waited too long, I would lean against the wall and fall asleep."
"When you came out and saw me sleeping, you would tug on my ear to wake me up."
"But you weren't much better off."
"Every time, before we even got home, you would be so tired that you could barely keep your eyes open."
"And then I would carry you home like I did when we were kids."
"Sometimes, if I couldn't carry you, I would hold you and stumble my way home."
"Qian Fan, I've always wanted to ask, why is it that I run out of energy just when we're almost home?"
"Is it because you're too heavy?"
Qian Fan chuckled softly, "Is that so?"
"Maybe."
"Who knows?"
"But I think it's because you were too small."
"You were just so tiny back then, insisting that I carry you home."
"When I saw that you couldn't carry me, I had no choice but to hold you instead."
I chuckled lightly, "Qian Fan, I've actually always wanted to tell you something."
"You don't have to tire yourself out like this."
"You can share all your thoughts with me."
"You don't need to worry that I'll dislike you for certain things."
"Qian Fan, I hope you're happy."
"I hope you can live freely like you did when we were kids."
"I don't want you to feel constrained in your feelings because of me."
"Qian Fan, I..."
Qian Fan rubbed my head and said, "Alright, don't say anymore."
"I know what you want to say."
"But Zixuan, you should understand that some things are in the past and cannot be changed."
"We can never go back to the past."
"Right now, I just want you to be well."
"As for everything else, I don't want to think about it."
"I also don't want you to force yourself to do things you don't want to do just for my feelings."
"What I want is simply for you to be happy."
"As long as you're happy, I can be happy too."
...
That day, I brought up breaking up again.
Qian Fan was furious.
He wandered aimlessly for several hours until he finally arrived at the underpass of a bridge.
He looked at the ruins before him, feeling empty inside.
He didn't know what to do.
He didn't know how to bring me back to the past.
That carefree past.
Qian Fan built a house under the bridge.
A house from my childhood.
He didn't even know why he was doing this.
He only knew that he wanted to do something.
Even if it was meaningless.
He hopes that one day, he can take me to see it.
But he is also afraid, afraid that I will remember those painful memories.
Afraid that I will never dare to face my past.
Afraid to give my heart to him.
So, he has been waiting.
If I dare to go home, he will come to pick me up.
If I don't dare, he will send me home.
Even if it's as friends, he is willing.
He opens his phone and looks at the candy he placed in the jar.
The candy has the words, "Zixuan, I like you."
"If you haven't noticed, then forget it."
"If you haven't noticed, then I'll write it again."
"Even if it's countless times."
"I am willing."
"Zixuan, I want to hug you."
"In our faint light."
"Behind us are ruins, ahead is the galaxy."
"We will welcome the secrets after the snow melts together."
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