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I just want to love well once
墨書 Inktalez
Li Mei is a very good friend of mine, and we share everything with each other. No one ever expected that just two days ago, she jumped from the fifth floor of her house and ended her own life.
I have met her husband, An Jianguo, but I don't know much about him as a person. On the day of Li Mei's funeral, I went to the scene. At that time, I really wanted to go up and slap him a couple of times to vent my anger, but when I saw so many people there, I held back. I just felt sorry for Li Mei; she was only 25 years old and left this world so early. I am extremely saddened by this.
Li Mei told me some things about her and An Jianguo before she passed away. They were just some trivial matters in their relationship, and I didn't take them to heart. Every couple has their arguments, but I never expected their relationship issues to escalate to the point where she chose to end her life. I couldn't accept it for a while.
Thinking back to the day of the incident, Li Mei came to see me. At the time, I felt something was off about her, but I couldn't quite put my finger on it. She gave me some of her favorite novels, saying she wouldn't need them anymore. After she left, I felt even more uneasy about her. I wanted to go to her house, but I couldn't leave work. When I got back to the dorm after work, the first thing I did was call her. No one answered, and I regret not calling An Jianguo that day. Maybe then she wouldn't have jumped.
Li Mei has been gone for five days, but I still can't pretend that nothing has happened. I felt terrible that day, so I went straight to Li Mei's house after work.
When I got to her building, I saw the lights on inside. I knew An Jianguo was at home. I didn't even knock on the door, I just broke in.
"An Jianguo, get out of here!"
I rushed into the living room and saw two men sitting on the sofa. There were a few empty beer bottles on the coffee table, and they were still holding cigarettes, looking at me with a dazed expression. I was even more angry. Before I could say anything, An Jianguo suddenly stood up and said, "Meng Xue, what are you doing here?"
"How can you still have the mood to drink here? Give me back Li Mei, give me back Li Mei! A perfectly fine person just disappeared without a word!" I reached out and grabbed his clothes to hit him, but was stopped by someone.
"No, I'm telling you, miss, what's gotten into you? Can't we talk it out? Why resort to violence? You seem pretty quiet, what's all this commotion about?" Another man spoke.
"I'm talking to An Jianguo, what's it to you! Get out of my way!"
"Meng Xue, I know you must be cursing me in your heart, wishing to tear me apart. I don't want this either. Why can't she just let it go, why did she have to jump off the building! Even if you kill me, Li Mei won't come back!" An Jianguo suddenly lowered his head, furrowed his brow, and picked up a glass, downing a large cup of beer.
That day, the three of us all drank too much. We all sat together because of Li Mei's issue and had this heavy drinking session. I don't remember if I said anything offensive or hurtful, or if I got into a physical altercation. I only remember that the other guy is An Jianguo's good friend, and he was the one who took me back to the dorm. His name is He Bing.
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