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Urban Magic
墨書 Inktalez
City B, a mid-level city, is the kind of place where nightlife supposedly begins at eleven o'clock in the evening.
Drunken men are everywhere, lingering in this alley at midnight as if they had made a pact. They chat aimlessly or vent their frustrations fueled by alcohol. No one is perfect, but their lives are a complete mess, filled with too many regrets. The most painful part is living without the ability to make amends; life has only one theme: helplessness.
Among them is a middle-aged man with long black hair. He is called middle-aged not just because of his age but due to his disheveled appearance; in reality, he is simply weary at heart. He differs from others: he drinks as much as they do, but he never shares his thoughts with anyone. Instead, he numbs his nerves with alcohol, seeking the feeling of intoxication.
His name is Lin Feng, a bartender at a nearby bar. He cannot be labeled as a rogue because he is quite honest; however, his life has been a series of muddled experiences. Apart from the few words he utters while working, he rarely speaks.
Yet, he has the highest sales commission in the bar, and over ninety percent of his patrons are women—mostly older socialites.
Although he doesn’t engage in conversation, these women still flock to the bar not for a fleeting romance but because they know he would never entertain such notions.
What attracts these socialites is his handsome yet weathered face and the gaze that invites others to understand and care for him. It’s a gaze born from unbearable past experiences—deep yet imbued with a different kind of essence. Despite having a slight disability in his leg, it does not diminish his charm.
He is aware of all this but continues to live life on his own terms. During work hours, he sticks to pouring drinks without uttering an extra word. To him, if commissions are high, he drinks more at night to prolong that numbing sensation; if commissions are low, he drinks less. In short, life holds no meaning for him.
He has no wife or children, and no one has ever seen him with any woman. He is alone, spending most of his time in bars and this alley filled with drunks. As for where he resides, no one knows; perhaps he has no home or concept of family.
He has contemplated suicide but chose this lifestyle after years as a mercenary. Slowly aging, he realizes that if he continues living this way, he might last another ten years—perhaps even die sooner from alcohol poisoning.
It’s a tragedy: a person whose heart has died continues to exist in this world. What immense courage that requires! Strangely enough, he possesses that courage but lacks the will to end his life. His experiences of crawling out from among the dead each day have taught him how foolish suicide can be. Even if he spends his life numb from alcohol, he feels fortunate to still experience that numbness because it proves he is still alive.
What a contradictory dilemma! Such issues are tangled and chaotic, yet no one pays them any mind.
“Hey man, what’s up with women these days? They’d rather marry rich guys than settle down with us regular guys. Why is that?” A young man dressed like a college student asked someone nearby, likely under the influence.
“Haha… Women! What’s going on? Bro, judging by your student outfit, did your girlfriend run off with someone else?” A nearby drunkard seemed to grasp the situation and commented while patting the college student on the back.
"Well, they think we lack ability and don't know how to be considerate, but really, they just think we don't have money! That rich kid left, and after being with her for so long, we never even held hands. They say we're not considerate; haven't I been squeezing out time every day to be with her? After just two weeks, she dumped me, and in the end, all she did was cry." The student continued to vent his frustrations, his voice slightly choked, likely from just experiencing a breakup, and a breakup due to lack of money.
"Haha... let's drink," the person next to him could only offer encouragement for more drinking.
Lin Feng watched all of this unfold. His pale face twisted in pain as he took another swig of alcohol, memories flashing through his mind like a movie reel.
Ten years ago, he too was a big student, someone who had worked hard every night under a lamp to get into a prestigious university. The moment he was accepted into college, he smiled widely, holding onto the hard-earned money from his foster mother as he arrived at the university he had longed for.
A prestigious university is different; not only is the environment good, but even the girls are beautiful. He secretly vowed to make something of himself, to find a pretty girl to bring back to the countryside and show off to his foster mother, then find a decent job to support his family and end the exhausting life his foster mother led for him.
However, he quickly became disillusioned. College was not high school; despite trying to approach those girls, they hardly paid him any attention. At first, he didn't understand why, but later he realized it was because he came from the countryside and had no money—people were unwilling to befriend him.
So he worked tirelessly to earn money, taking on several part-time jobs and working day and night.
Finally, love came his way. In the second half of his sophomore year, he accidentally saved the campus beauty and started dating her. Everything felt wonderful.
This blissful situation lasted for six months. For half a year, he obeyed her every word, being considerate and gentle. Their relationship consisted mostly of him accompanying her and doing everything for her; the only intimate action they shared was a kiss. Until one day when he saw her walking out of a lingerie store with a rich playboy from school and getting into his car. He clearly saw her laughing happily—he had never seen her this happy during their entire time together.
Later she explained that she was just trying to secure a job after graduation and assured him that she would know how to handle things.
It was a humiliation—a kind of shame that no man could bear—but having suppressed himself all along, he quietly listened to the beautiful girl's words. After she finished speaking, he expressionlessly left the scene. No one noticed his red eyes or the tears that fell; it was the first time he cried.
He left school and bought five or six bottles of beer. Coming from a poor background, he had never drunk before, but he knew that alcohol could numb him well. He longed to forget everything after getting drunk—forget that beautiful girl named Xie Wanting whom he once loved deeply. He felt powerless to take revenge on that rich playboy despite having been insulted by him before.
After downing two bottles of beer for the first time, he felt slightly dizzy but didn't stop; he kept pouring more into himself. In a corner of the street, as he drank alone, he suddenly realized that apart from his three roommates, he had no friends to drink with—and he didn't want to share such an embarrassing story with them.
The five or six bottles quickly disappeared into his stomach. His head felt heavy as if it might explode at any moment, yet he wasn't satisfied; he hadn't passed out yet. All that filled his mind was Xie Wanting's smiling face like a blooming flower.
He planned to cross the street and continue to the convenience store across the road to buy a few more bottles.
As he walked over slowly, he seemed to see a car about to hit him, but his swaying body couldn't keep up with the rhythm of his dazed mind. He couldn't dodge it, so helplessly, he could only raise his hands in front of him, an instinctive action that he knew would have no real effect.
"Bang..." A loud noise echoed, leaving a pool of blood on the ground...
Perhaps it was the favor of Lady Luck; Lin Feng did not die from the collision. Instead, he was rescued by the owner of the bar where he now worked. He began this indifferent life, living as a mercenary for a few years before returning to help out at the bar run by the person who saved him, as a way to repay his debt. And so it continued until now.
Returning from his memories to reality, Lin Feng took another deep swig of alcohol. Even now, he felt he had no face to meet his adoptive mother or his relatives back home. He could only send his monthly wages back home; he didn't dare call them because he feared hearing their voices. Sending money was not only for their living expenses but also a way to let them know he was still alive.
Looking at the student next to him who was crying in pain, he felt a strong resemblance between them. He wanted to help him, but he knew that was just a fleeting thought in his heart.
Shaking his head, Lin Feng picked up the bottle and staggered toward the small room he rented next to the bar. Calling it a house was generous; it was just one room.
He opened the door and collapsed onto the bed without bothering to wash up—just himself, without much fuss.
Suddenly, as Lin Feng entered a dream state, he felt himself lighten and opened his eyes again, finding himself in a whirlpool of lightning. Strangely, he did not feel any harm from the lightning. Aside from some weightlessness, there were no other discomforts.
What he didn't know was that he existed in a state of soul now.
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