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墨書 Inktalez
I had been in the hospital for over two months when one day, my mother looked at me, hesitating to speak.
"Xia Xia, I want to discuss something with you. If you agree, just nod; if not, you don’t have to say anything. Is that okay?" she said slowly.
"There’s a little girl who was abandoned at our doorstep. She’s only about a month old. What do you think? Should we keep her?"
A little girl? It must be Xiao Bao; she has come back to us. My heart stirred slightly.
"Mom, it’s Xiao Bao! Quickly, bring her to me!" Hope sparkled in my eyes.
Seeing my first reaction in over two months, my mother’s tears began to flow.
"Wait here; I’ll go get Xiao Bao for you. Don’t cry; I’ll be right back," she said.
When my mother handed Xiao Xiao to me, I knew instantly. This was not Xiao Bao. The moment her small hands grasped mine, I realized the truth. But I would love her just as I loved Xiao Bao.
"Mommy, Mommy, are you home?" Xiao Xiao’s clear voice rang out.
Lu Ningyuan's face turned pale; he thought I had remarried and that he could finally let go of his feelings for me.
I hurriedly called out, "Xiao Xiao, go inside first; Mommy will be right in."
"Oh, okay, Mommy! I’ll go play now!" Hearing Xiao Xiao's cheerful voice made Lu Ningyuan turn away dejectedly, his back appearing so lonely and desolate. Watching him leave stirred an inexplicable sadness within me. I knew that the love we once shared had vanished with Xiao Bao and could never be reclaimed.
I closed the door, and Xiao Xiao immediately rushed over to hug me tightly. "Mommy, are you unhappy? If I hug you, will you feel better?" she asked gently.
Looking at her small body clinging to me, my heart gradually warmed.
Lu Ningyuan sought me out several times afterward, but each time I ignored him. Slowly, he stopped coming around. I finally chose to officially date Xu Wei, who doted on Xiao Xiao immensely. Even my parents remarked that I seemed much happier and more vibrant than before.
One day after work, I prepared to pick up Xiao Xiao from school. When I arrived, I saw Xu Wei waiting at the school gate with an enormous cotton candy in hand. It was quite a sight—a big man holding a pink treat; the contrast was striking. Parents nearby were watching him while children who had already been dismissed looked on enviously.
"You’re going to spoil Xiao Xiao like this," I said to Xu Wei.
"Xiao Xiao is so well-behaved and adorable; what’s wrong with indulging her a little? Are you jealous?" Xu Wei teased.
Before I could retort, Xiao Xiao came bouncing over.
"Wow! Uncle Xu, is this for me? Thank you!" she exclaimed excitedly.
"You'll ruin your teeth eating that!"
"Mommy, I'll brush my teeth right after I'm done! My teeth won’t decay that quickly," she replied playfully.
Looking at Xiao Xiao's joyful expression, Xu Wei and I exchanged a smile. If Little Treasure were still here, would she be like Xiao Xiao?
When my mom called to tell me that Little Treasure was gone, I felt as if I had lost my breath. How could Little Treasure be gone? I still remember the feeling of her soft little hand grasping mine.
Xia Xia suffered a lot during her pregnancy; in the early stages, she couldn’t eat anything except cucumbers and tomatoes. We were poor back then, and there was nothing good to nourish her. I felt guilty watching her struggle.
Later, after hearing my parents' comments about valuing sons over daughters, I resented them for a time, but they were the ones who raised me after all. When I went to find Xia Xia and discovered her with a big belly, I was surprised. There was still a chance for us to return to how we used to be, as long as the child in her womb was born safely.
I never expected that Xia Xia would almost not survive; the emotional turmoil nearly broke her. Hearing her cry in the delivery room shattered my hopes once again. Later, when I saw an abandoned little girl at the orphanage, I took her to Xia Xia's doorstep. Could she provide Xia Xia with some comfort?
Xu Yan was just a distraction for me during my boredom and loneliness. At that time, Xia Xia had severe pregnancy symptoms, and my parents were putting too much pressure on me. They often asked for money regarding Ning Yu's matters, and only by being with Xu Yan could I find some relief. I became immersed in the allure of Xu Yan’s figure, succumbing to the thrill of betrayal.
"I know about you and Xu Yan; it's disgusting," Xia Xia said, and at that moment, I realized we were truly finished. She knew everything; she was completely disappointed in me, and I had finally lost the girl who had walked alongside me.
From a distance in the hospital, I saw Xia Xia leaving with that little girl and Xu Wei. She wore a faint smile on her face; it turned out she was so happy after leaving me.
I scratched at the red bumps on my skin and smiled sadly. I had just been diagnosed with HIV because of Xu Yan. Not only had she been with me, but she also indulged in relationships with many others due to her materialistic nature. When I went to confront her after getting my test results, I found another man leaving her house in despair.
Little Treasure, Daddy has also been punished. When you see me again, will you forgive me? Probably not; you wouldn’t want a father like me, would you?
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